In 2010-2011, I was ready to give it all up. Everything I thought I was building was slowly falling down around me.
Imagine being in a house where the foundation collapses and the structure implodes, and you’re standing there in the center of it, alone… that’s what it felt like. Despite it all, I never gave up on my dream of being an artist.
In high school I was asked to give a quote to go alongside my photo in the year book. Not given much time to think, I stated, “I have a dream, and I will achieve it.” As an artist it’s hard to find inspiration when you’re being advised to give up on that dream, to find another career…a Plan B. I never developed a Plan B outside of the art industry. It’s like my mind is incapable of extending itself past that realm. I didn’t know what to do, where to go, or who to confide in. I only knew that this was something I had to go through and that things would get better eventually, the beautiful struggle.
I cut all my hair off, severed a few relationships, lost almost everything I had; everything that defined who I thought I was. In this struggle, I lost…AND found myself. I learned to value patience more than anything. I was recently asked via mywalkuncensored.com, “What do you do when you don’t hear His voice?” I answered, “I wait.”
So during 2010-2011, I waited. I waited for something miraculous to happen, but it didn’t happen right away, not until 2012.
I am an artist. I have an innate ability to create art. It’s beyond a blessing to get paid to do it, so my dream has become my reality. To put it simply, I have a strange life…the best things that have happened to me are things that have happened organically. They weren’t forced, anticipated, or contrived.